By Michael E. Miller
By Ryan Yousefi
By Kyle Munzenrieder
By Sabrina Rodriguez
By Michael E. Miller
By Carlos Suarez De Jesus
By Luther Campbell
By Kyle Munzenrieder
So many cool people turned out for the Swelter party: Tovar (thanks for the ride home, my brother); Ralph Cavallaro (Quit is not breaking up, Addy is healing and the others are committed to resurrecting the band; Ralph will soon move to New Yawk to create music-biz computer thingies); the members of Young Turk (gosh, a Miami band that's been signed by two major labels); Island's Joe Galdo, a legend; Matt and Ed and Dave from Broken Spectacles; Steve Hack from Big State Distribution; the guy from Third Wish; Jason Gordon from WVUM; Fritz from Excessive (buy their CD, for chrissakes); Jen (local-music show host on WSH...er, I mean WVUM); Jen Birchfield from JAM; Nil "The Fish Man" Lara; Ferny from I Don't Know; Keith Schantz (I forget what he does) and Lee and Mindy although I didn't see any of the Causes guys (or gal); Jim Murphy; Jeff Lemlich; Jim and Jonelle along with their friend Warren Hicks of MSI; Robin Simon; Rob Gelbman; some guy named Billy with the killer; Rich Ulloa; oh, Christ, who am I forgetting? Plenty. But you get the picture. Those who I forgot, do something, I'll put your name somewhere.
Speaking of pictures, I got photos that night of Kennedy having extremely kinky sex with Sandra Schulman on the patio over by the pay phones. As if Mr. Kennedy weren't in enough trouble already. Eiseman broke the news to me: "Can you believe this guy?" Well, no. Eiseman explained that Kennedy did something really stupid A posting a flyer in record stores hyping Tasting Your Molester A at the same time the band is receiving all kinds of support toward signing a big major-label contract. Eiseman had to go around and undo Kennedy's propaganda blitz. What did the flyer say, you ask? Well, I'm no censor. I don't want Rooster Head to sign a big major-label contract because that would mean fewer live shows in South Florida:
"Wanted: People to purchase the new album by local supergroup ROOSTER HEAD. Along with each purchase you will receive a large vial of anal drippings supplied by the band and their mothers respectively. The first 500 women or transsexuals to buy the album will get a vigorous clit massage with a hard bristle oven brush. The first 450 men will have their testicles cut off, they will then be sent to Lampur for a very sacred testicle torching ritual. And finally anyone under 18 regardless of sex will be sodomized until rectal bleeding occurs."
Grammar needs work, but I get it. After their set Kennedy told me that Rooster Head is breaking up. Bob Wlos was sickened and disgusted and revolted by Kennedy's advertising methods, and if he heard one more thing about it he was outta there. So I'm standing in the back of Stephen Talkhouse with Wlos on one side and Kennedy on the other. "Tell Bob anal drippings are a good thing," Kennedy whispered in my ear. "Hey Bob, anal drippings are a good thing," I told Bob. "Depends on who's licking 'em," Wlos spat back before stomping off in a rage.
Mike, you'll never get to heaven if you're sodomizing God. Does anybody out there get it?
Oh, one problem with Swelter party. The copies of the CD A 48:06 -- weren't ready. The manufacturer in Texas received a huge emergency Xmas order from some major label, delaying the 48:06 order. God, is that fucking perfect?
I don't know, but several of these scenester types -- not to mention Michael Lacey, one of the owners of the sprawling New Times corporation, who visited Miami a few weeks ago -- came up to me and said, "I really like what you wrote about your father and your family. Touching et cetera." So my mom and dad, who moved to South Carolina a few years ago, are doing fine. Brother Rog came over the other day and helped me fix my car. Doug's working for the City of South Miami now. Chuck's listening to Joshua Kadison.
And what else is going on?
Day By The River plays Beatles covers tonight (Wednesday) at Stephen Talkhouse.
Nil Lara and Beluga Blue's new CD, My First Child, will be released this week and the band will smoke the Talkhouse on Sunday. Street buzz has it that some other local superstars will jam with Lara and company that night.
Swelter Records honcho and band manager Michael Eiseman and his wife Anna celebrated the birth of their first child just two days before the Swelter bash. It's a boy (six pounds and eight ounces, twenty-and-one-half inches) named Austin Scott Eiseman. Congrats.
Zen Dog plays East 50th Rock and Roll Cafe next Tuesday.
Oh, at the Swelter Records party, Edison Shine opened the showcasing with a rock-ass set, but they're from Tampa, so who cares.
Big CD release and performance and party for Nancy Hartline and the Rhythm Republic this Saturday at Musicians Exchange. R&B and blues and jazz.
The club that's opening up Mid Beach (north of South Beach, natch), Blue Steel, opens up its microphones every Tuesday for an acoustic jam beginning about 7:00 p.m. Zac and 7 are the hosts, so you know. The low-attitude joint is at 2895 Collins. Call 672-1227.