Welcome to the Terrors' Dome

Far be it from me to advocate lawless behavior, but Seattle's success started me thinking that perhaps it's time for somebody here in Miami to make a bold move, like kidnapping one of those major-label fungi currently infesting the Seattle music scene and transporting him here. We could tie him to a chair at the Square and make him sit through the next Thon in its entirety. Before you know it, Miami would be the next original-music mecca, and every kid with long hair and a guitar would have a six-figure deal. The Holy Terrors would be Rolling Stone cover boys, desperately trying not to look like millionaire rock stars.