Inside Feature

His GOAL (already accomplished, I think): To contribute usefully to the political dialogue.

FOUTCH, Marsha. (Democrat: Moline, Illinois) Another veteran, she too first ran in 1988. "At that time my slogan was `America is sick and it needs a nurse,'" Foutch says. This year it's the bumper-consuming "`I am not handsome enough to be President' - in other words there won't be a woman president." Foutch's ex-husband was a sailor, and stories he shared from his adventures in foreign bordellos gave Foutch her signature Why Not? idea: Legalize prostitution, tax the revenues, and watch the deficit drop like the pants on a skinny thirteen-year-old male with a new Playboy. Foutch campaigns by scribbling her message on Business Reply Envelopes and depositing these in mailboxes. Unfortunately, she has a humongous skeleton in her closet. As Foutch admits, she is sexually obsessed with Rep. Lane Evans (D-Ill.) and has attempted to gain access to the warmth of his form. In a recent letter, she's been put on notice by the state's attorney in her home county to stop bothering him.

"I was five years ahead of him at the same high school. My cousin was in his class and started talking about him," she explains. "One allegation [by the state's attorney] was that I left `humorous lipstick' marks on his glass office door. But they were just kiss marks." Sorry, Marsha. But the Monkey Business photo "just" showed two good friends, Gary Hart and Donna Rice, relaxing. Perception is everything at the presidential level.

GOAL: "I...don't really know."

FULANI, Lenora B. (New Alliance Party: New York, New York) Fulani, who bills herself as "the first black and first woman in American history to run for president in every state," has scored significant outsider coups in this, her second try for the White House. As reported last month by the New York Daily News, the Harlem psychotherapist ranked third on the list of 1992 candidates (behind Bush and Harkin) for the first round of federal matching funds. Based on the amount her campaign had raised as of January 1, Fulani was to receive $624,497, compared with Bush's $2,629,366 and Harkin's $1,075,189.

(To qualify for matching funds, a candidate must, among other things, raise $5000 in each of twenty states for a total of $100,000.)

Fulani campaigned in the New Hampshire Democratic primary with what her campaign spokesman labeled "people to people" tactics. The vision was to bring inner-city blacks from the Bronx and elsewhere face to face with New Hampshire whites in town meetings, to "share what they have in common." (This is more than a metaphor; Fulani actually bused inner-citians around the state.)

One thing that worked against Fulani: she is enemies with state party chairman Chris Spirou, who, since the mid-December debate fiasco, saw to it that she (and other also-rans on the ballot) were not included in party-sponsored debates. Fulani complained to the Democratic National Committee Rules and Bylaws Committee, without success.

GOAL: Building for the future. In November Fulani told the Durham, North Carolina, Herald-Sun that she can't win in '92. But by the year 2000, she expects a "major and competitive, independent, left-of-center party' to be a force in American politics.

GRITZ, James "Bo." (Populist: Sandy Valley, Nevada) Gritz (pronounced with a long i) is an energetic rightie who has mounted an intense, years-long crusading saga that has more texture than all three Walking Talls. Gritz packages himself as everything from "the Real-Life Rambo" (in the Eighties, he ran several search-for-POWs missions to Laos) to "America's Most Decorated Green Beret." He has charged the U.S. government with running drug operations in Southeast Asia and has been charged (and acquitted, in 1989) of using a false passport during a 1986-87 swashbuckle to Burma to "find out if a drug overlord named Khun Sa was holding U.S. prisoners." (Gritz claims this mission was ordered by then-Vice President George Bush.) His far-right platform, The Bill of Gritz, would re-establish America as a Christian nation, abolish the Federal Reserve and IRS, "restore states' rights," halt foreign aid, and "retake Capitol Hill." Gritz wants to find 11,000 "senior patriots" to replace the bureaucrats he will sweep aside as one of his first acts. He means senior in the grayhead sense. "Grandmothers and others who have but one agenda," he says, "the healing of America."

Gritz plans to go the distance, and promises a slate of spicy-sounding TV adverdramatorials. "We will hire an actor to portray Thomas Jefferson. The announcer will say, `Thomas Jefferson!' He will look up and say, `What®MDUL¯?! You mean to tell me you have income tax in 1992? That's unconstitutional!'"

GOAL: To win. "If we don't take the Hill with ballots," Gritz says, "in 1996 we'll be defending our rights with bullets."

HIRSHON, Russell Baptiste Munoz. (Democrat: Washington, D.C.) Thirty-year-old Hirshon, a lanky bartender and sometime performance artist who ran for mayor of Washington in 1990, says he's running to stir young people from their apathy and call attention to the "serious issues." His campaign consists of irreverent posters, television ads, and his travels through downtown clubs, during which he wears an Uncle Sam outfit and passes out buttons.

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